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  • White supremacists chanted "The Jews will not replace us!" So let's replace those 4 Baltimore monuments with statues of the Seinfeld cast.
  • There are BOTH SIDES to violence. Take North Korea for instance. We should really share the blame equally with Kim Jung Un. It's 50-50.
  • CTRL + ALT + DELETE + RIGHT SHIT
  • It took Trump two days to denounce Nazis, but only one day to denounce that denouncement.
  • Hey Republicans - think about how much tax dollars Democrats are saving you by tearing down those confederate monuments themselves!

Buy my fucking book! (please)


 

Phil’s debut humor book, “How to Marry a Finnish Girl” is out now on Gummerus Publishers.

About Better! Funner!


 

Better! Funner! is a blog written and curated by Phil Schwarzmann. You’ll find funny original pieces, some not-so-funny pieces, plus stuff that made Phil laugh from around them internets. Enjoy!

Better!

Funner!

Better!

Funner!