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Top 25 Electropop, Dreampop, and Indiepop albums of 2012

The album – not a random offering of singles, but a piece of art that should be enjoyed in one go, from start to finish. Anyone who says the album is dead should trash their iPod and buy a record player. (Subscribe to this playlist on Spotify.)

Here we go…

#25 | Savoir Adore – “Our Nature”
This Brooklyn band dubbed themselves “fantasy rock”. You had me at “fantasy”.
Favorite Tracks: Loveliest Creature, Dreamers

#24 | Niki & The Dove – “Instinct”
Swedes are the kings and queens of indie electronica.
Favorite Tracks: Tomorrow, In Our Eyes

#23 | Baby Monster – “City of Lovers”
Electropop with some soul.
Favorite Tracks: City of Lovers, The Music’s So Loud

#22 | White Blush – “White Blush EP”
Dreamy electronic sounds from LA.
Favorite Tracks: Mirror, Jolene

#21 | The Pass – “Melt”
Synthy indie rock that reminds me of MGMT.
Favorite Tracks: Halo, Will You Wait

#20 | Tokyo Denmark Sweden – “Tokyo Denmark Sweden”
Electrpop trio from Australia.
Favorite Tracks: Comets, When it Breaks


 

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Top 50 Electropop, Dreampop, and Indie Tracks of 2012

Electropop, dreampop, indiepop, dancepop, cheesepop, synthpop, 80’s revival, new new wave, new new romantics, electric music for adults, music that sounds great with a glass of wine on a couch in a loft…this is what I’m into, and 2012 was a great year for my obsession.

Here’s my Top 50 tracks of 2012… (Subscribe to the Spotify playlist)

 

#50 – San Francisco’s chillwave hero.

#49 – Disturbing vocals about wanting to be a cripple. Fortunately much of it is in French.

#48 – Californians loves hearing other Californians sing about California.

#47 – Swirly synthpop.

#46 – Synths, drum machines…and heavy electric guitars. Rock.

#45 – None of the band members are from Tokyo, Denmark, nor Sweden.

#44 – Great follow-up to their 2010 hit “A Real Hero” you probably heard from the movie “Drive”.

#43 – Drifting in and out, describes the sound perfectly.

#42 – Bleeps and bass. It’s SWEET.

#41 – More bands from “Drive”. More bone-shaking analogue synths.

#40 – Two Swedish chicks yelling in unison to dancepop. I love it.

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Top 10 Things Only Americans Find Funny

Americans are confident they are the funniest people in the world. I mean, have you seen something funny from another country? Of course not. So many great comedic Americans like: John Candy, Jim Carey, Russell Peters, Sofia Vergara, Ricky Gervais, David Brent…all Americans. All funny.

But sometimes the American sense of humor doesn’t make home runs abroad. Here’s ten things only hilarious Americans find funny…

 

A Christmas Story
Nothing captures America’s childhood innocense more than A Christmas Story. While being a box office flop, it experienced a resurgence thanks to media mogul Ted Turner, who, during Christmas, repeats this movie 24 hours straight on his network. Americans have literally memorized every line of this, while the outside world has never heard of it.



 

License Plates
While European plates are way more James Bond, Americans are more Austin Powers. Who doesn’t love a cryptic joke during morning rush hour?



 

Saturday Night Live
A staple of American television since 1975, SNL has launched the illustrious careers of gabs of comedic actors. The live show is written and recorded in the span of just six days and lampoons American politics, people, and culture, leaving the rest of the world saying, “huh?” and “I do not like this Adam Sandler you speak of”.

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Top 10 coolest dudes named Phil

With an title like that, you know “Schwarzmann” won’t be anywhere close to this list.

We Phil’s get little respect. No superhero, or just plain ol’ hero, is named Phil. If you ever see a guy named Phil in a movie, he’s about to get shot. Or he’s gay. Or even worse, he’s straight-but-should-be-gay. And not manly bear-gay either, but metrosexual-gay.

Phil’s are weaselly, annoying, arrogant, short, supporting actors, geeky-but-not-in-a-good-way, about to get shot, gay, or all of the above. On the plus side, we’re often wealthy, educated, possibly royalty, sensitive to women, milky white, funny, having large genitalia, doing well with “the ladies”, or liars.

Though Phil’s hate being Phil’s, we still think our name is cooler than “Caleb”.

But, there are a few shining Phil’s who refused to be reduced down to a common stereotype. Here’s the top ten coolest dudes who’s making life a lot easier for us guys named Phil…

 

10. Phil Margera from Jackass

Bam Margera’s dad who took every prank like a man.



 

9. Phil Lesh of The Grateful Dead

Phil’s are accepted in the hippie community and it’s all thanks to the founder of the Grateful Dead.



 

8. South Park’s Phillip (from Terrance and Phillip)

We Phil’s now have a viable excuse to fart in public.

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Top 10 Board Games to buy when you’re drunk at Target

I’ve played 500+ board and card games and owned around 300. I’m a little obsessed with board games. Point being: I know what I’m talking about!! Listen to me about this!! I know very little about anything, but board games are an exception.

Having a house party? Need some entertainment? Nothing is better than board games and alcohol. Good games, not Monopoly. Or Rock Band. When you’re stumbling around Target or Walmart, here’s ten games guaranteed to keep your guests drinking your wine until 4am…

10. Hey That’s My Fish

Dead simple rules, quick play, and perfect for 2-4 players. Move your penguins around the ice collecting fish!

 

9. Pit

The loudest game you’ll ever play, and works well with up to 8 players. Try to collect a full set of cards by yelling, err, trading with others.

 

8. Carcassonne (or any of the Carcassonne variants)

The most beautiful game you’ll ever play. Build a map, then play on it.

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The Top 10 Workaholics episodes

Comedy Central’s Workaholics could be the funniest show on TV right now, and definitely doesn’t get the respect it deserves from us comedy nerds. (Probably because it doesn’t involve Louis CK)

Starring three guys we’ll be hearing about for decades, and surrounded by one of the best supporting casts ever, Workaholics is a swirly of pot humor, drunken behavior, college antics, childhood memories, cubicle culture, smart jokes and dick jokes. Lots of dick jokes. Smart dick jokes.

With only a handful of callbacks, you can dive into this show anywhere. But here’s the top 10 places to start.

#10 | s01e02 | “We Be Ballin”

The supporting cast ensures no dull moments. Their ambiguously black-latino colleague, Montez (Erik Griffin, pictured below), always steals the scene.

 

#9 | s01e05 | “Checkpoint Gnarly”

Busted checking out porn in the workplace.

 

#8 | s01e01 | “Piss & Shit”

Not sure if this is technically the pilot or not, but a great episode to start. Surprise drug test at work and the guys need to buy clean piss from elementary schoolers.

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The Top 20 Films of 2011

I’ve seen 48 films from 2011, here’s my Top 20. Starting down low and going up…

 

20. The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo
Not sure this was necessary after the excellent Swedish film. And Noomi Rapace was a better Lisbeth than Mara Rooney.

 

19. Hall Pass
Jason Sudeikis + Owen Wilson + Stephen Merchant + The Farrelly Brothers = This was funny. But definitely could have been more funner.

 

18. Unknown
Liam Neeson recreates the same ass-kicking excitement from “Taken”.

 

17. Paradise Lost 3
The final saga of documentary that begin 15 years ago.

 

16. We Need to Talk about Kevin
Tilda Swindon deserved an Oscar nomination.

 

15. The Lincoln Lawyer
An all-around fun movie.

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  • White supremacists chanted "The Jews will not replace us!" So let's replace those 4 Baltimore monuments with statues of the Seinfeld cast.
  • There are BOTH SIDES to violence. Take North Korea for instance. We should really share the blame equally with Kim Jung Un. It's 50-50.
  • CTRL + ALT + DELETE + RIGHT SHIT
  • It took Trump two days to denounce Nazis, but only one day to denounce that denouncement.
  • Hey Republicans - think about how much tax dollars Democrats are saving you by tearing down those confederate monuments themselves!

Buy my fucking book! (please)


 

Phil’s debut humor book, “How to Marry a Finnish Girl” is out now on Gummerus Publishers.

About Better! Funner!


 

Better! Funner! is a blog written and curated by Phil Schwarzmann. You’ll find funny original pieces, some not-so-funny pieces, plus stuff that made Phil laugh from around them internets. Enjoy!

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