Click me:

Vampire Tim Lincecum

Be on the lookout for VAMPIRE TIM LINCECUM!! He was bitten and turned from a human starting pitcher, into a relief pitcher. He drinks tiger blood.

 

Author Description

Phil Schwarzmann

I'm a writer, stand-up comic, and author of “How to Marry a Finnish Girl” (Gummerus Publishers, 2011). Better! Funner! is where I write. Poorly. More of my jibber-jabber at: www.philschwarzmann.com

Buy my fucking book! (please)


 

Phil’s debut humor book, “How to Marry a Finnish Girl” is out now on Gummerus Publishers.

  • Under the Trump administration, we’ve seen the least number of arrests on the southern border IN DECADES. Congrat… https://t.co/mDAkIEEIOs
  • Trump got his wall. Her name is Nancy Pelosi. #sotu
  • As Democrats demand that the Virginia governor resign, Ralph Northam announces he’ll just switch parties instead.
  • Two days in a row when fakeass patriots have disrespected chiefs. #SuperBowl
  • Back at the office after a couple weeks off. Or as I like to call it, "Let's see what's growing in my half-empty c… https://t.co/bA49xn3F5i
  • You know you're fully relaxed on vacation when you and your partner argue about which day of the week it is, and you're both wrong.
  • Looked at my Outlook for the first time in a while. It just said, "Bleak."

About Better! Funner!


 

Better! Funner! is a blog written and curated by Phil Schwarzmann. You’ll find funny original pieces, some not-so-funny pieces, plus stuff that made Phil laugh from around them internets. Enjoy!

Better!

Funner!

Better!

Funner!